"Yes," he confirmed with a small nod. He didn't bother sugarcoating things for Arthur, suspecting that was where the other man's thoughts had gone.
"But the ways a mononoke comes into existence are as multifarious as there are ways for a person to experience regret. Not all are even dead, though that is more often the case."
He was quiet for a time, setting aside the chopped vegetables and mixed a batter from flour, egg, a bit of salt and the last of his rice wine. It wasn't as though he thought Arthur was stupid, but finding ways to plainly explain nearly nine centuries of dealing with mononoke without dangerously oversimplifying matters to a man who had known without a shadow of a doubt the supernatural existed for maybe half a year was proving to be a bit challenging. There was a lot of context and nuance that he simply had to brush aside.
"When an ayakashi comes into the world, it is drawn to a person's Truth and Regret, creating the mononoke's Form. They become trapped by and in that Regret; their very being defined by it to the core."
After gathering enough wood he set it aside and took a seat, watching the medicine seller cook, lighting himself a cigarette as he did so.
“So a person has to regret what they done for a Mononoke to be created?” He confirmed. He knew had had a lot to learn about the world of the supernatural, but he hoped he would from Todd. He doubted he’d ever be able to kill or banish or whatever the medicine seller did to them, but at least recognizing what they were and how they came about was worth knowing he figured.
If it was regret that created and bound-what did he call it? Ayakashi?-into a mononoke, then he doubted Micah despite all his murdering had left any in his wake. Bastard ratted the whole gang out to Pinkertons, regret was something Arthur very much doubted the snake had ever felt in his life about anything. Dutch though...did he regret killing that girl in Blackwater? Or even the old woman he’d choked to death on Guarma? How many Mononokes had he left behind him?
Then Arthur realized, was it any of his business? Did it matter? He couldn’t go around fixing everything his former mentor had broken in his path. The medicine seller seemed in no hurry to find mononokes, hell unless he’d snuck out of the cabin to deal with some, then they’d gone all winter without hunting one down. So did that mean he just dealt with them as he encountered them, like at the Emerald Ranch bar?
Christ, he really knew nothing about what this man did didn’t he?
"The Regret belongs to the mononoke," he explained, "but yes, it can be regret about what one has done. What one has not done. What was done to them. What they failed to escape. What desires have gone unfulfilled. It can be so many things, it is impossible to quantify in anything more specific than an ayakashi that has merged with human Regret."
As the oil heated over the fire, he lightly dusted the rings of onion and slices of sweet potato with flour.
"I suppose one can most easily consider it an affliction of the soul, but even that feels like an oversimplification."
Battering the veggies a few at a time, he dropped them into the bubbling cooking oil, letting them sizzle until they were a pale golden brown before scooping them out.
"...I can change the subject if you prefer. I know it is not the most pleasant topic."
Arthur scratched his neck, doing his best to follow along, but now a bit confused. So regret on the part of the victim?
"So...if someone's murdered but the victim is feelin' regret either regardin' their killer or towards...something else, they become a mononoke?" he asked trying to nail it down.
He shook his head at that. "No, not at all, I just tryin' to figure how these creatures come into being..." he paused then snorted dryly, "And wonderin' if old Dutch...or even myself might have left some behind in our time."
"It is possible, but far less common than you would think. A mononoke is more a perfect storm of varying circumstances and very powerful emotions. Regret alone is not sufficient, but it is crucial."
He gave a wry smile as he fried their dinner, filling a bowl with crispy onion rings and sweet potato slices.
"Else all of us would be dogged by any we have wronged."
With their dinner done, he took the oil off the heat and set it aside to cool before joining Arthur with their meal.
"Are you worried your actions may have brought one into existence?"
Perfect storm of varying circumstances. So it was a few key parts, mixed with a lot of uncertainty and random chance, and even then, rare that it occurred at all.
Arthur nodded at the question, "Killed a lot of people in my time. Ain't killed folk for the pleasure of it though. Maybe Agent Milton for all the pain and grief he caused us and countless others, there were times I wanted little more than to put my hands around his throat, but I weren't the one who killed him, Abigail did. Micah, him I wanted dead too for the same reasons, though he walked away from that fight."
He took a crispy sweet potato and bit into it. It was hot and delicious.
"I don't know. I reckon I might have had I not gotten sick and had we not lost so many folk. If Micah hadn't had Dutch's ear after Hosea was killed, maybe I'd still be with him." he ate a moment and shook his head, "Too many maybes and what ifs. I know the past can't be changed, ain't never tried to. But least I can do is make sure we didn't leave anythin' behind to hurt more folk. Hence all the questions about them mononokes."
Arthur had another potato, smiled, and gave the medicine seller's temple a greasy kiss. "Tastes real good darlin'"
The plural at the end of 'mononoke' gets a soft chuckle.
"The past is immutable, but it is due some reflection," he said around a mouthful of onion, leaning into the kiss. One pale hand comes up to brush a few crumbs from Arthur's beard before cupping his cheek.
"One must simply be wary of entrapping themselves in a cycle of regret."
Arthur nodded in agreement. He was doing his hardest to try and not regret the things he'd done. They were past him, and the gang was months behind with no way to change how things ended.
He did feel much better since the mountain. Not health-wise, he'd long since recovered from his brush with death. But, in his head. Marston and his family had gotten away. Charles was likely still helping the Wapiti somewhere north, and Tilly was safe too. The people he could save, were saved.
So now it was best to focus on himself. Revenge was not in his book, he'd not go hunting for Micah or Dutch. He'd stay with the medicine seller, long as he wanted him around.
"No, I'm lookin' ahead more these days" he smiled affectionately at him.
"As am I," he mused with a slight upturn to the corners of his mouth. Leaning his head on Arthur's shoulder, his hand wandered delicately up his back.
"I have never really considered such things before. They always seemed far out of reach."
And he wouldn't squander an opportunity to at least try. He doubted either of them were the settling down sorts; the world was too big, too interesting for their feet to stay put long. But it would be nice to have company on the long and winding roads; to traverse the wilder places of the world with someone who appreciated such things.
In the past, Arthur might have tensed or scooted away from the affection. Now, he leaned into it, wrapped a strong arm around the other's slight frame.
"We can go anywhere you wanna darlin'" he said quietly.
He'd ride with him for a long time.
"So, we gonna go back and deal with that mononoke or you gonna leave it be?" he asked, taking another fried something or other.
He leaned with him, closing his eyes as his hair was played with a little.
Arthur loved it when the medicine seller just lightly touched him like this. The simple contact, the warmth of his fingers through his clothes or buried in his hair. Sometimes led to more intimate fun. But other times, they just were. Holding and touching one another. unable to do so in public but, it was okay, he was with him, not them.
"In the mornin'? Okay. Figured you wanted to do it at night so fewer people would be around." he said, withdrawing to have one more potato and finish his water.
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no subject
"But the ways a mononoke comes into existence are as multifarious as there are ways for a person to experience regret. Not all are even dead, though that is more often the case."
He was quiet for a time, setting aside the chopped vegetables and mixed a batter from flour, egg, a bit of salt and the last of his rice wine. It wasn't as though he thought Arthur was stupid, but finding ways to plainly explain nearly nine centuries of dealing with mononoke without dangerously oversimplifying matters to a man who had known without a shadow of a doubt the supernatural existed for maybe half a year was proving to be a bit challenging. There was a lot of context and nuance that he simply had to brush aside.
"When an ayakashi comes into the world, it is drawn to a person's Truth and Regret, creating the mononoke's Form. They become trapped by and in that Regret; their very being defined by it to the core."
no subject
“So a person has to regret what they done for a Mononoke to be created?” He confirmed. He knew had had a lot to learn about the world of the supernatural, but he hoped he would from Todd. He doubted he’d ever be able to kill or banish or whatever the medicine seller did to them, but at least recognizing what they were and how they came about was worth knowing he figured.
If it was regret that created and bound-what did he call it? Ayakashi?-into a mononoke, then he doubted Micah despite all his murdering had left any in his wake. Bastard ratted the whole gang out to Pinkertons, regret was something Arthur very much doubted the snake had ever felt in his life about anything. Dutch though...did he regret killing that girl in Blackwater? Or even the old woman he’d choked to death on Guarma? How many Mononokes had he left behind him?
Then Arthur realized, was it any of his business? Did it matter? He couldn’t go around fixing everything his former mentor had broken in his path. The medicine seller seemed in no hurry to find mononokes, hell unless he’d snuck out of the cabin to deal with some, then they’d gone all winter without hunting one down. So did that mean he just dealt with them as he encountered them, like at the Emerald Ranch bar?
Christ, he really knew nothing about what this man did didn’t he?
no subject
As the oil heated over the fire, he lightly dusted the rings of onion and slices of sweet potato with flour.
"I suppose one can most easily consider it an affliction of the soul, but even that feels like an oversimplification."
Battering the veggies a few at a time, he dropped them into the bubbling cooking oil, letting them sizzle until they were a pale golden brown before scooping them out.
"...I can change the subject if you prefer. I know it is not the most pleasant topic."
no subject
"So...if someone's murdered but the victim is feelin' regret either regardin' their killer or towards...something else, they become a mononoke?" he asked trying to nail it down.
He shook his head at that. "No, not at all, I just tryin' to figure how these creatures come into being..." he paused then snorted dryly, "And wonderin' if old Dutch...or even myself might have left some behind in our time."
no subject
He gave a wry smile as he fried their dinner, filling a bowl with crispy onion rings and sweet potato slices.
"Else all of us would be dogged by any we have wronged."
With their dinner done, he took the oil off the heat and set it aside to cool before joining Arthur with their meal.
"Are you worried your actions may have brought one into existence?"
no subject
Arthur nodded at the question, "Killed a lot of people in my time. Ain't killed folk for the pleasure of it though. Maybe Agent Milton for all the pain and grief he caused us and countless others, there were times I wanted little more than to put my hands around his throat, but I weren't the one who killed him, Abigail did. Micah, him I wanted dead too for the same reasons, though he walked away from that fight."
He took a crispy sweet potato and bit into it. It was hot and delicious.
no subject
He had a few bites of food before continuing.
"Else you would have followed Dutch down his spiral of madness as long as his plans provided foes to fell."
The Medicine Seller had met many monsters in his time. Arthur was not among them.
no subject
Arthur had another potato, smiled, and gave the medicine seller's temple a greasy kiss. "Tastes real good darlin'"
no subject
"The past is immutable, but it is due some reflection," he said around a mouthful of onion, leaning into the kiss. One pale hand comes up to brush a few crumbs from Arthur's beard before cupping his cheek.
"One must simply be wary of entrapping themselves in a cycle of regret."
no subject
He did feel much better since the mountain. Not health-wise, he'd long since recovered from his brush with death. But, in his head. Marston and his family had gotten away. Charles was likely still helping the Wapiti somewhere north, and Tilly was safe too. The people he could save, were saved.
So now it was best to focus on himself. Revenge was not in his book, he'd not go hunting for Micah or Dutch. He'd stay with the medicine seller, long as he wanted him around.
"No, I'm lookin' ahead more these days" he smiled affectionately at him.
no subject
"I have never really considered such things before. They always seemed far out of reach."
And he wouldn't squander an opportunity to at least try. He doubted either of them were the settling down sorts; the world was too big, too interesting for their feet to stay put long. But it would be nice to have company on the long and winding roads; to traverse the wilder places of the world with someone who appreciated such things.
no subject
"We can go anywhere you wanna darlin'" he said quietly.
He'd ride with him for a long time.
"So, we gonna go back and deal with that mononoke or you gonna leave it be?" he asked, taking another fried something or other.
no subject
"Likewise, we can go wherever you please as well. I imagine with your newfound freedom, there are many places."
He made a soft, contented sound as he leaned into the warmth of the other man, fingers wandering up his back to run through his hair.
"But there is no rush. I will see to the mononoke in the morning."
no subject
Arthur loved it when the medicine seller just lightly touched him like this. The simple contact, the warmth of his fingers through his clothes or buried in his hair. Sometimes led to more intimate fun. But other times, they just were. Holding and touching one another. unable to do so in public but, it was okay, he was with him, not them.
"In the mornin'? Okay. Figured you wanted to do it at night so fewer people would be around." he said, withdrawing to have one more potato and finish his water.